Saturday, May 12, 2012

To all the Mothers

It seems inevitable that if a group of parents gathers, the conversation will soon turn to the accomplishments of their children. It doesn’t take long to hear how fast Timmy can run, or how many academic awards little Jane has received. It’s information that begs an audience. It’s natural. We want other people to see just how unique, special, and amazing our children are, just as we do. We want to know our children are recognized and make an impact on this world. Our children have the power to transform us into doting fan club presidents and marketing directors. The desire to know our children are recognized and make an impact on the world does not stop when our children leave this world and go to Heaven, yet many people don’t want toy listen. I’ve spoken with many baby loss parents about the reaction we generally receive when we discuss having a child (or children) in Heaven. We often hear well-intentioned but hurtful remarks, or perhaps just as damaging, nothing. No acknowledgement. No mention of our children’s names. No requests for more information. Nothing but a look of near-panic as the person scrambles to find a new topic or get away from us. It’s a shocking thought to someone who is not familiar to the baby loss world. “Old people” die. Babies don’t. right? Unfortunately, they do. It doesn’t matter what the age is, or how good parents are at parenting their children. Babies die too. When we learned of Carys' diagnosis, the verse Jeremiah 1:5 became very significant to me. I believed Carys had a purpose, and I felt obligated to share her story. i wanted people to know how amazing she was, and how much she was impacting our lives. So I began to blog. I found a way to share her story and her legacy. She had a purpose. God created her for a reason, and I will always look for opportunities to share with others how she impacted the world.

In an hour, it'll be Mother's Day. I want to wish all the mothers out there a very happy, peaceful mother's day- especially those mothers who are not always recognized as mothers. Your babies, regardless of how long they were in your life, will always be your babies. I encourage you to find a way to acknowledge them. 

  • Share your baby's story here (link)
  • Find a project to take on in your baby's name.
  • Contribute to a project already in progress.
  • Make a donation to the Gideons International in memory of your baby, to have New Testaments distributed in his or her name.
  • Put a memorial/statue in your flower garden in memory of your baby
  • If you haven't done so yet, name your baby.
I know this post is getting long, but I'd like to share a list of projects and blogs other baby loss parents have started in order to share the legacy of their children. Feel free to add yours in the comments or let me know of any corrections that need to be made!


www.prenatalpartnersforlife.orgWe offer support by connecting parents facing an adverse diagnosis with other parents who have had the same diagnosis. We have many resources such as adoption agencies with clients waiting to adopt and love a special needs child should a parent feel they could not care for them.”

www.missinggrace.orgMissing GRACE Foundation's mission is to provide resources and support for families that have experienced: pregnancy loss, infant loss, infertility or adoption and to advocate for comprehensive, patient-focused prenatal care for all women. Five core areas encompass the heart of the mission: Grieve, Restore, Arise, Commemorate and Educate.”
“providing hand-made memories for families facing loss”

Katie's Fighters - set up to promote awareness and help families with funeral costs for babies with anencephaly

Brinley's Gift -set up to help families with funeral costs for babies with anencephaly

Everlasting Grace – collecting baby blankets and items to donate to hospitals for grieving families

Sustaining Grace -pays for 4D ultrasounds

Angel by My Side -make birth annoucements

On The Wings Of A Butterfly- memory boxes and butterflies

Faces Of Loss

String of Pearls

NILMDTS- bereavement photography

Be Not Afraid

Stephanie Dyer Still Standing online magazine

Sufficient Grace “Sufficient Grace Ministries for Women, a 501 (c ) 3 non-profit, non-denominational Christian organization, was founded in 2004 by Kelly Gerken with the purpose of reaching out to women and families to offer comfort, encouragement and hope. The Dreams of You division of this ministry was created specifically to provide comfort to women and families who have lost a baby through miscarriage, stillbirth, or infant death.”

Baby Boards: “A baby board is a custom designed remembrance decor item. Special pricing for bereaved family. Email or visit for more information. 100% customizable.”

Moving on, but never forgetting.
Lucy George

You've Become My Light
Cait Groover

A Willful Heart: The Journey of Palmer
Jenny Lees

The Little Journey of Baby Thomas
Holly Bush

Caring for Carleigh
Holly Haas

Speaking Peace
Misty Palka Nielson

Under His Wings
Kim Cone

Gabriel's Message
Andrea Hernandez Cude

Kolton's Story
Lacy Sanchez

Cayden Ryan
Christina Burns

The Story of our Gift from God; Paige Miracle!
Amber Mapas

Rob Smith

Sophia Grace's Journey: An Anencephaly Story
Tabitha McClure

Everyday Carnival at the Adams' home
Erin Lutz Adams

Caring Bridge site
Melanie Larsen Sinouthasy

Carrying Theo
Josie Louise Ward

Our Miracle Lilly Elizabeth
Elena Strode

Amelia Grace: a journey of life
Melissa Raabe Lorang